How to Get Better at Doing New Things: Successive Approximation, Not Perfection

When we set out to learn something new, most of us fall into the same trap: expecting ourselves to be perfect right away. Whether it’s a new skill at work, a leadership practice, or even a new habit at home, we demand too much, too soon. And when perfection doesn’t happen, we get discouraged, give up, or label ourselves as “bad” at it.

Behavioral science offers us a much better model: successive approximation.

Jennifer training a dolphin in Hawaii while in college

What Dolphins Can Teach Us About Learning

When I was training dolphins, we used an approach to training new behaviors called successive approximation. Which basically means, you reward approximations of the wanted behavior and over time, fine tune it. We aren't rewarding perfect behavior. We are rewarding approximations of the behavior we want.

When trainers teach a dolphin a new trick, we don’t expect the animal to leap out of the water and spin on day one. That’s never going to happen. Why? Because dolphins don't speak human. If we want them to do something, we can't just say - please jump out of the water. We instead, have to help them figure out what we are asking for by both showing and rewarding behavior that is closer to what we want. 

We reward small steps that move the dolphin closer to the final behavior. These are called approximations. If the dolphin swims near the right spot—reinforcement. If it jumps a little—reinforcement. If it starts to spin—reinforcement.

Each attempt doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to be a little closer to the desired behavior. Over time, those approximations add up  and lead to the behavior we have been working towards them learning. 

And ... I'm going to let you in on a little secret. Dolphins never do any behavior perfectly. They may do something reliably (like - more often than less often when given the signal). But perfection is not something any animal trainer expects from their animals. It's just not a realistic goal. 

Humans work the same way.

Stop Chasing Perfection. Start Rewarding Progress.

The key insight is this: no behavior is ever truly perfect. We’re always refining, always improving. The healthiest mindset shift you can make is to stop expecting perfection from yourself and instead aim for incremental successive progress.

Did you do a little better than last time? That’s success.
Did you move one step closer to your goal? That’s success.
Did you learn something useful—even from failure? That’s success too.

By celebrating small wins, you create momentum. By focusing on improvement instead of perfection, you unlock resilience. 

If you are a leader - please apply this to your team! Reward them for improvement. Don't punish them for not being perfect. 

Applying Successive Approximation to Yourself

• Break it down. Don’t aim for the whole behavior at once. What’s the next small step you can take or learn?

• Track progress, not perfection. Keep your eye on improvement over time, not flawless performance.

• Reinforce the attempt. Acknowledge and celebrate your effort, even if the result wasn’t ideal.

• Never “finish” learning. Even once you’re skilled, you can keep refining. Improvement never stops.

This approach doesn’t just reduce stress—it makes learning stick. You’re rewiring your brain through practice, repetition, and reinforcement.

A Humanistic Shift in Perspective

Instead of saying, “I failed because I wasn’t perfect,” you begin to say, “I’m succeeding because I’m improving.”

That’s a radical, freeing shift. And it’s not just about learning new tricks—it’s about how you approach leadership, relationships, and life itself.

Want to Learn How to Apply This in Practice?

I teach these techniques in my course, Mastering the Five Managerial Superpowers. It’s all about using behavioral psychology to hack your brain, improve your leadership skills, and create lasting change—not by aiming for perfection, but by practicing better.

Because the goal isn’t to be perfect. The goal is to improve.

What did training dolphins teach me?

 I used to train dolphins in college. I learned a lot through that experience. What were the main things I learned and carry with me? What I learned about humans by watching humans learn how to train dolphins. 

1) watching how people learn new information. Specifically, how people learn how to train dolphins and the stages they go through.  

The first phase: Some people when they first learn, watch and listen and don't act on it - are very hesitant. These become really great trainers.  Others are very hands on and dive in right away. These folks generally become good trainers but not excellent trainers.  When I am doing an onboarding, I pay attention to the people paying attention as these are the people who usually turn into my best employees.  It is easy to dismiss them and pay attention to the ones that dive in, but they aren't necessarily learning as precisely as the ones who observe first do. 

The 2nd phase is when people have learned enough to know mistakes when they see it and they start pointing out the mistakes of others. This is actually them learning and reminding themselves to not make those mistakes - even though it's annoying for the people being reminded to not do something. And a part of it is bolstering their own self esteem by reminding themselves how much they have accomplished/learned. 

The third phase of learning is enlightenment where the trainer is really good and also really calm and patient with new learners. They are confident in what they know and don't need to bolster themselves or remind themselves of things and so don't harp on the newbies.  People in phase 2 might be annoying, but if they are coached compassionately, they will eventually make it to phase 3. 

2) The 2nd important thing I learned what has to create unlearning through a behavioral technique called extinguishing a behavior. This is what I teach in my anti-bullying and anti-harassment training. How to untrain unwanted behavior - like bullying.  If you want to learn more visit: https://humanistlearning.com/category/bullyingharassment/