Need help constructing an ethical framework for yourself?

 If you are currently on a "spiritual" or ethical journey of discover, I encourage you to consider Humanism as an option.

At some point in life, we all have to decide what sort of person we want to be. We need to figure out what we believe about life, the universe and everything. And we need to sort out our ethical framework for ourselves.

Often, we adopt what we were taught as children, but as we grow, we start to question whether what we were taught really makes sense or works for us. So we start reading and exploring to learn what others before us thought about and what approach they took to deal with the enormity of it all and the problem of existence.

My son, who is currently 15 going on 16, is asking these questions for himself right now.  I've given him a reading list of various philosophers from various traditions so he can work through this for himself.  And he does have to do this for himself.  He has to test assumptions and given wisdom to see if it makes sense for himself before he adopts it as his own.

What I know from experience though, is that most people who go through this journey - end up at something akin to Humanism. And often, eventually - Humanism.

Most philosophies and isms are people's attempts to answer the great questions in life.  That's why it's helpful to read philosophy from a variety of different standpoints.

Why people keep arriving at Humanism is because Humanism is essentially the consensus on what the various philosophies have concluded are the best answers to the big questions of life. 

Honestly, you can probably save yourself a lot of heartache, if you just read about Humanism first.  Then, as you read through the various disciplines and philosophies, you will start to recognize the common threads that run through all of them.  It really will save you quite a bit of time and anxiety if you consider Humanism as a possibility first. 

I don't say this to convert you to Humanism as there is no such thing. It's more a matter of experience as a teacher of humanism for decades now. Understanding what Humanism is - will help you get more out of all of your other readings and experiences by orienting you to look for the common human elements in all of the ethical and spiritual systems you explore as you ponder the question - what does it mean to be a good human being. 

Understanding a little bit about Humanism as a philosophy and ethical life stance and it's history will aid your personal exploration and journey through philosophy and ethical framework options by helping you understand your journey, while unique, is not unique. As long as there have been humans, there have been humans pondering the same questions you are pondering now. And I find that comforting. 

Here are some resources to help you get started: http://humanisthappiness.blogspot.com/2021/05/learning-about-humanism.html

I also offer online programs - some free and some for a fee - you may find helpful. https://humanistlearning.com/category/lifeskills/philosophy/

I do recommend one course in particular. Yes, it is for a fee, but think of this like you are purchasing a book, except, you get to ask questions of the author.  https://humanistlearning.com/livingmadesimpler1/ 

 

Think about how you feel

In order to be a force for good in the world, you have to be able to translate your emotions into rational thought. It isn't easy and that is why Humanists spend so much time learning how to think critically.

We humans have a problem. And that is, in order to solve our problems well, we have to think. The problem is that we usually don’t think well because we aren’t just thinking beings, we are also feeling beings.  We don’t just think rational thoughts, we also feel our sometimes rather irrational emotions.

Despite the difficulties, Humanists strive to integrate our emotions with our critical thinking so that our problem solving with do justice to both our emotions and our ability to think clearly and critically.  Let me break this down for you on how this works.

Critical thinking helps us solve our problems. However, compassion helps us improve our interpersonal relationships. Being ethical infuses our lives with meaning and purpose.  The thing is, in order to be compassionate, you have to think about being compassionate. In order to be ethical, you have to think about being ethical. To ensure your problem-solving is guided by your good emotions, you have to think.

The desire to be good is the easy part. Thinking well is the hard part, which is why, we Humanists spend so much time focusing on learning to think well. Because it is only when we think well that we can properly harness our emotions.

What do you struggle with the most when it comes to controlling or harnessing your emotions?

Love Yourself

2 wonderful sisters who aren't
afraid to be themselves

This post is for my mom and for my aunt. I grew up in a family of nonconformists. We are all unique and we thrive on that. Not quite fitting in is a badge of honor in some ways.

I’m telling you this because I also come from a very happy family. I mean seriously. They all are really funny, love to play and don’t worry too much about what other people think.  We have each other and that’s enough. We don’t need outside approval.

We all know to not worry about what other people think. Either they will like us as we are, or they won’t. And if they don’t, so what. As long as a few people like me the way I am, I’m set. 

This is the key to being fearless and something that I wrote about in my book on how to deal with bullies (TheBullyVaccine.com)  But telling you all to be fearless isn’t exactly the primary reason for this post.  The real reason is because my mom wanted me to do a post that included a song I wrote for my Aunt Lana for her 50^th birthday.  The song is called Ode to Lana and yes, she was delighted and laughed hysterically at it. She’s a wonderful woman, laughs, loves and lives fully and is the biggest Beethoven freak you will ever meet.

Enjoy – Ode to Lana as performed by my old band The Dashboard Messiahs

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