Being Responsible

Responsibility is all about how you respond to what’s happening around you.

Ellie Peterson from The Power of Positive Workouts (http://www.ppworkouts.com/) shared this thought with me the other day. She said, “For me being responsible is my ability to respond to myself first. With this self-knowledge, I can give to others from my highest self.”

I love this quote for several reasons.

1) I like that she gets to the root of the word. Responsible is about how you choose to respond. It’s about your ability to respond.

This concept is important to me because I do think we not only have the ability to respond we therefore a responsibility to choose our response wisely. This is central to my practice as a Humanist.

2) Her first responsibility is to herself.

It’s not that she doesn’t give of herself to others. She just understands, she has to make sure she is ok first so that she CAN give of herself to others.

3) Responsibility is a good thing. It’s something you do for you.

Too often we treat responsibility as if it’s a drain on us. Just the opposite is true. Taking responsibility for how you respond gives you control and frees you up to be the person you want to be. Instead of responding instinctually, you are choosing your response. It’s empowering!

It is very easy to become overwhelmed with work and with our responsibilities. When that happens I like to remind myself that my instinctual response doesn’t necessarily have to be how I actually respond.  Taking the time to consciously choose your response so that your actions are a benefit to yourself AND to others, is the hallmark of a good leader and what it means to be responsible.

What does it mean to be responsible?

Is responsibility a good thing? Or a bad thing?

Well, that depends on what you think responsibility is.  For a lot of people seeking happiness, responsibility seems dull. Responsibility is something that keeps us from being able to pursue our dreams.  It’s our job, or school, or our family that requires our attention.  It’s the think that keeps us from being free.

People who think like this try to avoid responsibility. I know a woman who left her family because it was “too much responsibility” for her. She clearly wasn’t happen then, but she isn’t happy now either. Avoiding responsibility hasn’t helped her to find happiness.

For a Humanist, responsibility is the key to freedom and therefore the key to happiness. We know that it is through responsibility that we gain control over our lives and this control equates to freedom. For a Humanist, responsibility isn’t a burden.

Even our responsibility to others isn’t a burden. It is our responsibility to others that gives our live meaning. Without meaning and purpose, people struggle with existential angst. By embracing responsibility, you infuse your life with meaning.

Responsibility gives you greater control over your life. This control helps reduce your stress levels. It also gives you a certain amount of freedom. The combination of reduced stress and freedom of choice are conducive to happiness. When you add in the benefits of having a purpose and meaning in your life, the result is happiness. Despite it all.

Yes, responsibility can be hard. It requires us to make hard choices at times. But the people who are happiest, are those who embrace the responsibility of making those choices and who are responsible enough to make the effort to make good choices, even when good options are hard to come by.

Don’t cheat yourself out of happiness. Be responsible – for your choices, your actions and your responsibilities to others.