Unveiling the Secrets of "Mastering the 5 Managerial Superpowers"

I am thrilled to announce the release of my latest book, Mastering the 5 Managerial Superpowers. This is not just another book on management and leadership—it's a deep dive into the science of how you can truly gain control over your responses, hack your brain using behavioral science, and manage conflict with unprecedented effectiveness.

I honestly believe it’s the most important work I’ve ever written. Here’s why.

Foundational Skills: Building the Bedrock of Effective Leadership

At the heart of Mastering the 5 Managerial Superpowers is the concept of foundational skills. This starts with cultivating self-awareness and compassion—because understanding yourself and showing empathy towards others are the cornerstones of effective leadership.

Once you’ve laid this groundwork, you can move on to mastering self-control. This isn’t about repressing your emotions but rather about understanding them so deeply that you can choose how to respond. Instead of reacting with a knee-jerk impulse, you can respond strategically, turning every situation into an opportunity for positive outcomes.

Hacking Your Brain: The Science of Change

The second big idea in the book is about hacking your brain. I explore how you can use insights from behavioral science to literally rewire your default reactions and change how you deal with problems. Change isn’t just possible; it’s something you can engineer within yourself.

Imagine being able to shift your mindset, break free from unproductive habits, and approach challenges with a renewed sense of clarity. This book shows you how to harness the power of behavioral science to make these changes not just aspirational but achievable.

Managing Conflict: Mastering the Art of Response

Finally, Mastering the 5 Managerial Superpowers delves into one of the most critical aspects of leadership and - life: managing conflict. The key to effective conflict management isn’t just about resolving disagreements. It's about managing your own response to conflict.

By mastering the skills of self-control and strategic response, you can approach conflicts not as threats but as opportunities. This book equips you with the tools to navigate these situations with confidence and poise, ensuring that you lead by example even in the most challenging circumstances.

Why This Book Matters

In a world where change is constant and challenges are inevitable, the ability to control your responses and lead with intention is more important than ever both in your personal and professional life. Mastering the 5 Managerial Superpowers is designed to help you develop these critical skills so that you can not only survive but thrive.

The reason I think this is the best book I've ever written is because it's not just about leadership. It's about self management. And how to accomplish that using behavioral science to change how you respond. I feel like I've shared the secrets of the universe and how to be human - better - in this book. Like everything else I've written was leading up to this. It's an odd feeling to have.  

The funny thing is - I wrote this course and book, because someone asked me to. They told me the topics they wanted me to cover. I thought they were great and I wrote about my approach to self awareness, managing change, conflict management and - managing actual real people. 

The point is, whether you’re a seasoned manager, a new manager, or just want to learn how to be a better human, this book offers actionable insights  based on science that will transform the way you approach your work and your life. 

I truly believe that the tools and techniques outlined in this book can make a profound difference in your life and in your journey as a leader. Thank you for your support, and I look forward to hearing how Mastering the 5 Managerial Superpowers impacts you.

Learn More: 

The online course can be accessed at: https://humanistlearning.com/mastering-the-five-managerial-superpowers/

The paperback is at amazon: https://amzn.to/3SXJy4O

The ebooks are at amazon: https://amzn.to/3AsFvHc

and at your favorite ebook retailers through draft2digital: https://books2read.com/b/bxANgv

The audio book is in process and will be posted at the humanistlearning website once it's available.

Difficult People Need Love

 Imaging if you could deal with difficult people – effectively, with dignity and grace and love in your heart. You can – if you use reason and science and LOVE! 

I was just chatting with a friend. They helped their mother in law, who is often angry with them, figure out how to stream a video service on their tv. They did this over the phone. Her husband overheard and said it was crazy. This woman is apparently rather cranky and uptight and difficult to deal with.  My friend just helped her with love and compassion and even when the woman was upset and frustrated, just giggled and continued to help, eventually resolving the problem in just under 20 mins. 

Why did this work?  Well - compassion works. Love Works. And yes, there is some science behind that. Specifically, behavioral science.

Cranky people are cranky because something is wrong. In this example, what was wrong, was the tv. If she expressed anger and frustration at my friend, it wasn't because my friend had done something wrong. It was because the cranky person wanted to watch tv and couldn't. 

My friend didn't get angry or frustrated too. She just continued to help her mother in law fix the problem. And eventually, it worked.

PS - if you want to learn how to do this or you want to teach your staff how to do this - check out my course - How to Handle Cranky Customer Problems.  https://humanistlearning.com/crankycustomers/

Meeting frustration with frustration only makes for more frustrated people.

Human interactions are a dance of stimulus response. Someone does something (stimulates you), and you respond. The key to really understanding these interactions is to understand, your response is a stimulus to the other person.

It doesn't matter why the cranky person is the way they are. It's likely not about you. You are just the convenient person for them to vent to. Lucky you.

Responding as if impersonal attacks are personal, doesn't fix the problem. Recognizing the pain the other person is in, doesn't justify their behavior. What it does is help you respond in a way that fixes the problem so that their crankiness - is no longer a problem - FOR YOU!  

That puts you in a position to help them. With love and a smile on your face.

So - the next time you find yourself dealing with a difficult person, don't take it personally. Accept that they are cranky and treat them the way you would want to be treated if you were cranky - with love and kindness. It goes a long way.

Overcoming trauma with grace

Learning how to reclaim and own your dignity after something horrible has happened to you. 

I was asked to write something to help people overcome drama and trauma in their lives with dignity and grace. 

I do have experience with this. I have had quite a bit of trauma in my life, and some of it was caused by relationship drama.  I'm in a great place now and happy most of the time. In fact, I was chatting with a psychologist the other day and he wondered if I was naturally happy, or whether I was manic depressive.  

Confession. I am naturally disposed to happiness. I do get sad. I do get angry. I get frustrated. I do get depressed. But those are deviations. My normal state is happy.  My son is the same way - his default state - is happy.

Not everyone is so lucky. This may very well be biological in the same way that some people are simply - more anxious, upset or depressed. That is their normal and moments of happiness are deviations from their norm.

Despite my normal state, I have had periods where I spent years in negative emotional states.  When I was being stalked, I was so anxious, I developed a physical problem as a result of the constant anxiety.   

When I lost my first child to stillbirth in the 8th month of pregnancy, it took a couple of years to get to some level of "normalcy."   I still can "lose it" and start crying uncontrollably when I think about it. 

Oh - and one time, I almost died. My galbladder went gangrenous. I got to the hospital just in time. Had I waited a day, I would have died. I knew it was bad when they doubled my morphine dose and gave it to me more frequently. 

I've also been subjected to some pretty serious personal and professional attacks on my character. 

I've had periods in my life that were manifestly horrible. I developed PTSD (diagnosed) from the stalking situation. And I've overcome the drama and trauma of all of that and gotten to a good place in my life. So I feel confident to talk about this.  In fact, who better to talk about how to overcome trauma, than someone who has done so successfully.

My Humanism is My Anchor

I'm not special

The first part of the Humanist philosophy that helps me, is the understanding that I am not special. There is nothing about me that will magically make me immune to the hardships of life.  

Bad things happen to good people for no other reason than bad things happen. I remember when I lost my child, and I went to an infant loss grief support group. I realized very quickly that I was the only person they ONLY dealing with grief. Everyone else had their theological world turned upside down. Not only did they have to deal with grief, they had to deal with the realization that their faith did not spare them from hardship. 

As crazy as it sounds, the knowledge that I am not special, helps me cope. By allowing me to accept the reality of what has happened and just deal with it.  I feel really bad for all my friends of faith who deal with grief plus. Grief is hard enough on it's own. I can't imagine adding the suffering that my friends of faith have to deal with on top of their grief.  It makes me understand why they get mad at god(s).  I don't get mad at god. I just grieve. It's easier.  

Others have done it - so can I

Another reason I am able to recover my emotional balance is because I know I can.  And I know I can because others have done so, and I've always figured if they can do it, so can I. 

I know my current reality, as bad as it is, will not be permanent and that I can take constructive steps to help myself get to a better place. I don't have to be passive. I can be pro-active. 

I can pamper myself. I can allow myself to find joy in between moments of sorrow.  I can treasure those moments without feeling guilty about my grief or sorry.

I don't have to act on my emotions - I can use compassion to guide my thinking

I can pamper myself. I can allow myself to find joy in between moments of sorrow.  I can treasure those moments without feeling guilty about my grief or sorry.  I understand my emotions are fleeting and whatever I feel - is ok. I can accept my emotions, without acting on them.

And this last bit is key.  I don't have to act on my emotions.  I can decide what to do - if anything - about those emotions. Often, I chose to do nothing but experience them.

One of the ways Humanism helps me is it reminds me to be compassionate with myself and others. If I am upset and frustrated, I feel compassion for myself for having those emotions and vow not to act on them. I then try to think of the person I am mad at - with compassion, so that when I do think of how I want to respond, I act reasonably. Often, that means - not acting at all.

Sometimes the best thing you can do to stop interpersonal drama - is to walk away and do nothing. Sometimes, you win - by not fighting.

The bonus to this approach is that - it's grace and dignity personified.  People who fight back - demean themselves. People who respond with grace and dignity, win. Not only does this help them maintain their dignity, it helps them feel better about themselves. You don't have to get riled up - you can just leave. Let the other person be a jerk. 

I find it's easiest to do this when I convince myself to be compassionate, with myself and the other person.  Often, another person behaving badly has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.  Just - walk away. Let them find someone else to hassle.  And yes, this is easier said than done.

Suffering is not Noble

The final idea from Humanism that helps me is the understanding that suffering isn't noble. There is no point to suffering. I don't get any points for suffering. It's an unfortunate reality that can't be avoided at times. But that doesn't mean I have to stay in a place of suffering. 

As a Humanist, I don't believe there is any purpose in life. We life, we may procreate, then we die. The only impact we have is in our life's work and whether we helped people or not.  As far as I am concerned, I may as well be happy.  I'd rather be happy than not. So - I chose to be happy.

This doesn't mean I'm automatically happy. It does mean that when I find I'm not happy and it's a lasting condition, I take action to rectify the problem.  

Is the problem grief?  I can take small steps and know that my grief will eventually ebb - if I let it - and I let it because, to me, it would be crazy to hold onto grief. Holding on to grief is not noble. It's stupid. If I can't let go - and there have been times where I had trouble, I seek out help in the form of therapists and counselors. And they have always helped me identify what was holding me back so I could release it. 

The most dramatic example was the stalking. Therapy gave me my life back.  If you are stuck - get help. Don't continue to suffer. Do something to change and if you don't know what that is - get professional help.

Learn more:

I have a 6 hour online course where I teach my humanist approach to living life fully and happily.  It's called - Living Made Simpler and covers a variety of topics and discusses the humanist approach to living life well.  https://humanistlearning.com/livingmadesimpler1/

I also have a book called The Humanist Approach to Happiness - https://humanistlearning.com/the-humanist-approach-to-happiness-book/

Life isn’t easy. It is filled with challenges. How we navigate those challenges determines our success in life. If you want to learn more about how to be happy and how to think more effectively about the choices you make, this book will help.

Critical Thinking 101

 Like everyone, I am being subjected to misinformation on a daily basis. And, I'm interacting with people who believe things I believe to be untrue. And like everyone, I'm annoyed at what I see as the crazy belief of others.

So, let's review critical thinking 101.  The best way to ensure you yourself don't believe things that aren't true, is to constantly look for evidence that what you believe isn't true.

Yes, this means, considering actively the possibility that what you yourself think - may be wrong.

You can't really help others with this. You can only really control what you yourself think.

So, the next time you encounter someone who says, you're wrong, ask them for the evidence that proves you are.  And if they provide you with that evidence, accept it. Read through it. Take it seriously.  The worst that will happen is, you will find out you were wrong and learn something.

What often happens when I do this is - I find out the other person was wrong. This doesn't make me happy. It makes me annoyed. But at least now I know. 

Taking this approach helps me have nice conversations with people because instead of arguing with them, I am asking socratic questions and they tend to like that as it helps them share what they think they know. It also opens them up to my questioning when I read say - a federalist paper they pointed me to - and I read it and find it seems to say the exact opposite of what they told me it says. 

At this point, we can have a genuine conversation - most of the time.  

I only do this when I am genuinely curious and want to know why people are thinking what they are thinking.

However, there is some science to this too - which is that introducing doubt and getting people to research their own beliefs, is what helps people deprogram from cults. 

So stop being so annoyed that the people around you appear to be in a cult, and start asking them questions - just in case, you are. 

Pain is not a competition

I am a big fan of a Humanist writer named M.L. Clark. They recently wrote an essay about, "A Humanism that isn't based on ... it could be worse." If you are not already following Clark - you should. Here is the link.

https://www.patheos.com/blogs/anotherwhiteatheistincolombia/2020/05/humanism-could-be-worse/#disqus_thread

This essay - as with all their essays - resonates with me. The big important take away for me is: Pain is not a competition.

I am always surprised by how many people come to me for advice and say things like - I can't afford to freak out or be upset or depressed. Followed by - other people have it worse.  Yes - they do - but that doesn't mean that you can't own your pain. 

If you feel the need to freak out - you absolutely can. I am giving you permission. In fact - maybe you should! You have earned your emotions, just as I have earned mine.

I lost a child. I earned my freak out the hard way. Other people have lost family, or have a child in crisis. Whatever is going wrong for you - you have earned the emotions you all are experiencing as a result of it.

It is possible to experience your emotions - and then - move on with fixing them. I find - just acknowledging the validity of my emotions - helps me cope. I don't need to compare myself to others or diminish other people's pain. My pain is my own. And I've earned it. And I can still strive to do better. To me - that is what it is to be human and humanist.

Stop holding yourself up to an impossible standard. Yes - you have things that need to be done and demands on your time and it's horrible. Yup. It's ok to allow the horribleness of your situation to envelop you. Stop trying to fight it. Once you accept it - you can often rejoin the fight to make things better in a better frame of mind without causing a total meltdown (and yes - I've had a couple of those too - they are seriously unpleasant- but again - I earned them the hard way - the important thing is - they don't define me - they are just horrible things I experienced as part of this thing called - life.)

So - own your pain. It's yours. You don't have to compare yourself to others and if being strong is too much - stop being strong and wallow for a bit. Trust me - having been in some really deep places - it's impossible to wallow forever. Indulge a bit - and then move on - you will be emotionally healthier if you do this than if you try to contain it for some absurd reason.

Humanism can't just be about being a good person. It also has to be about allowing everyone to be fully human. And that means - you are allowed to have the full range of human emotions.  I mean for effs sake - if something horrible happened - how else are you supposed to feel - but horrible. You can survive these emotions. Just - feel them. It's ok if you do and you will be ok if you do. These emotions are part of the human tool kit for a reason. 

And if you are feeling them and feeling overwhelmed - seek out the help of a counselor. They have learned all sorts of tips and tricks to help you cope. The biggest mistake I've made in my life is not seeking the help of mental health professionals when I needed it because I thought - others had it worse than me so I should be able to cope on my own. Nope - there are things that can happen that are so bad - that we all need help to cope with them when they happen. That's part of the human experience too - sharing each other's loads. So - seek help if you need it. You will be glad you did.

Good luck.

Is Big Business Bad?

I am pretty progressive, meaning - I think positive progress is possible and that we should be working towards making the world a better place. As a Humanist - I define better compassionately - if it helps people flourish - it's good. If it harms people - it's bad.

So … how do I feel about big business.  Answer? Well - it depends.

I try not to have a knee jerk reaction to anything and I consider each moral situation - independently.

Big businesses can be good or bad or both - good and bad - depending on the company and what metrics we are using to determine what we mean by "good" and "bad."

There was a really great article in The Atlantic on this:
https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2018/04/learning-to-love-big-business/554096/

The subtitle is: Large corporations are vilified in a way that obscures the innovation they spur and the steady jobs they produce.

This doesn't mean that big business doesn't have legitimate problems. It totally does. It means we should be designing solutions to those problems in a way that doesn't cause - additional problems.

For instance - living wages?  Yeah - don't shut down the big businesses paying good wages and force everyone into smaller business that historically - don't have the resources to pay as well.  You get the idea.

To me - the debate over whether or not business is good or bad - is not about size.  It's about morality. Specifically - what model of business are we going to use.

Exploitative vs. Cooperative Capitalism.

I swear I am a capitalist. I've actually read Marx's book and understood it. I think capitalism offers a good mix of innovation and security and freedom as compared to other more restrictive systems. That doesn't mean I think laissez faire capitalism is good. Or that all forms of capitalism are good. I don't.
I only really like humanistic capitalism. Cooperative capitalism. And I've felt this way my whole life. I remember in high school - I was supposed to write an essay about our capitalistic system and I instead wrote about how we have a hybrid system that combines elements of both capitalism and socialism and I argued it was precisely because we have a hybrid system - that America - at the time - was flourishing. (Not to date myself - but I'm clearly now in 2019 - dating myself with that statement).

Exploitative forms of capitalism and business - are evil. 

This should not have to be said - but it does- exploitation is evil. It is harmful and any system built upon exploitation is evil because it actively harms people as part of the system.  I am a Humanist. Harm is bad. Exploitation causes harm and is therefore bad.  Socialists and communists are correct to state - that the exploitation of labor is evil. Because it is.

We should not and do not need to tolerate exploitation in our businesses or in capitalism.  It is not a necessary condition of the system and there are other models of capitalism and business that are built upon cooperation that are way more effective and it is those models we should be both pursuing and insisting on.

Let me give you an idea of what these differences are.

In my community - historically - we've had 2 basic capitalist economic systems in operation. One was exploitative (slavery) the other was literally - cooperative.  

I live on land that was once "home" to over 200 enslaved people working at a sugar mill. This business required government support in the form of military assistance to keep the enslaved people enslaved and to kill Indians who were helping enslaved people - escape slavery.  In Florida - the United States government fought 3 costly wars to prop up this exploitative economic system before the rest of the country said no more. At which point - the civil war happened.

Down the way - was a cooperatively own fishing camp. This camp was run by white people with Spanish Indians who traded with Spanish colonies around the Caribbean. It was self sufficient and productive and profitable. It did not require government support and military assistance to operate. However, the military did shut it down because the local slaver was insistent that the cooperative business operating - basically next door - was hurting his business.

When you consider these 2 business models that literally operated side by side: it's pretty easy to see that the cooperative one - was the better one. The exploitative one - wasn't just morally reprehensible, it was economically unsustainable without the additional stealing of public wealth to prop the system up.

We don't have to accept the status quo if the status quo sucks. 

People who advocate for exploitative capitalism need to be seen for what they are. They are not good business men. And no good business is run in such a way.  Good business pay living wages and share the prosperity they create.

When exploitative evil people insist that sharing wealth is socialist and evil - understand they are lying to protect themselves. the only people taking welfare are the exploitative capitalist. They are stealing all our wealth for themselves while hurting the rest of us through exploitation.  We don't have to accept it and we should not tolerate it. What they are doing - isn't capitalism (the creation and distribution of capital).  It's exploitative and criminal.

How do I practice humanism?

The simple answer is - try to be a good person. That’s pretty much it.

In all decisions you make - take time to think of what the ethical/good thing to do is - then try to do that.

Frustrated in a store - take a moment to think about what a good outcome would be - and try to do that.

In an argument with someone? Think of how you can change what you are doing - to get a better outcome -not just for yourself, but for them as well.

In business? Thinking through a strategic problem? Think about what a good ethical solution would be - then do that.

Just - try to be a good person.

Humanism has no dogma. We have not prescriptions or rituals or required behaviors. All that Humanism is - is a commitment to try to put our reason and compassion into action.

Here is a list of our commitments - Living Humanist Values: The Ten Commitments - TheHumanist.com

Can I condition myself to be happy in the morning (be a morning person)?

Yes. You can condition yourself to be a better morning person. Habit and behavior formation is well studied and just takes time to accomplish.

1) set a regular time to get up and don’t push snooze. Just - get up and get started. Will you be cranky at first? Of course. That’s part of the learning process. Accept it as part of the learning process and don’t let your cranky get in the way of actually getting up.
2) Congratulate yourself on getting up. How awesome is it. Yes - you are tired and cranky - but you still got out of bed when you wanted to.
3) Find a nice way to use the extra morning time you just gave yourself. Indulge in a little something to reward yourself. Only do this when you actually get up and get going.
4) Remind yourself how awesome you are for getting up even when you don’t want to.

After about 1 month - it should be a habit and you will feel better about getting up on time and be way less cranky about it.

If you want to learn more about the science of behavior and habit formation - and more importantly - habit unlearning - check out my online course here: https://humanistlearning.com/change1/

My new management book

I published a new book for Business Expert Press edited by David M. Wasieleski, Professor of Management & Business Ethics in the Palumbo Donahue School of Business at Duquesne University. 

The book is called: Applied Humanism - How to create more effective and ethical businesses. This book provides a short introduction to the philosophy of humanism and discusses how and why it is being applied to business and why it is so effective when you do so.

Review:

Chris Laszlo - of the Weatherhead Institute - has already read it and said,

 "I just finished reading your new book, Applied Humanism. I loved its clarity and straightforwardness. In many ways the writing is deceptively simple: the concepts and their applications are universal in appeal yet subtle in their implications for living and working in today’s world."

You can’t understand humanistic business management unless you understand what humanism is. This book provides a short introduction to the philosophy of humanism and discusses how and why it is being applied to business and why it is so effective when you do so. Humanism helps us prioritize human value as important. It supports positive interpersonal relationships and collaborative and respectful decision-making. Since all businesses are in the business of solving problems, good problem solving is essential to good business.

Humanism has already transformed many other disciplines including psychology, medicine, nursing, and more. Additionally, humanism is foundational to the practice of human resources, without which businesses cannot operate. It is important for business managers to understand the philosophy fully so they can understand how to not only manage people more effectively, but how to operate their businesses in a way that helps the communities in which they operate. This book will provide the primer they need to create more effective and ethical businesses.

This book can be purchased at amazon as a kindle or paperback book: https://www.amazon.com/Applied-Humanism-Effective-Ethical-Businesses/dp/1949991423/

If you are interested in using the book in a course please visit Business Expert Press and request a desk copy: https://www.businessexpertpress.com/books/applied-humanism-how-to-create-more-effective-and-ethical-businesses/

The book is divided into 4 sections

1. Introduction to the philosophy of Humanism (Philosophy)
2. Applying Humanism to the Business of Business (Integrating Ethics into Decision Making and Interpersonal Relationships)
3. Problem Solving Like a Humanist (Strategy and Decision Making)
4. Case Studies – Applying Humanist methodology to problems liked Diversity & Inclusion and Harassment problems in the workplace.

Humility - Think of Yourself Less

As a Humanist - I try to be humble. It's hard sometimes. But I came across this really great video by Diane Kucala about humble leadership.

She says, "Humility is NOT thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less OFTEN! Humility is one of 14 secrets to great leadership."

This is great advice and it's a great way to think about humility.  Think of how much better it would be if leaders - actually - listened. I don't think you can be a good leader if you and trying to be front and center.  A good leader pays attentions to the needs of others, to help those others flourish!

I have not read her materials yet - but plan to.  Her website is at: https://blueprintleadership.com/

Have compassion - Driving Edition

I was driving my son to school this morning and made a mistake. I wasn’t sure what lane to be in to turn into the school. It’s an honest mistake. I know where the turn is, but there seemed to be a line to turn further back than I expected. But I also saw – the line I thought was the line for school – the lead car was waiting to turn into a business – before the school. I wasn’t sure whether I should go around or wait in line as I wasn’t sure if THIS turn line was the right line.

rk008 - FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I decided to wait in line, but it was so far back that by the time I made this decision, there wasn’t really room to pull into the left turn lane. The result is that the back end of my vehicle was sticking out blocking the thru lane. I would have avoided this had I made my decision to go into that lane about 5 feet sooner. It’s an honest mistake. These things happen.

The car behind me, who I was now blocking, got cranky and honked. I skootched up as far as I could, but it wasn’t enough and I didn’t have any ability to correct my mistake until the car in front of me moved. Eventually the car behind me went around. But then… they pulled even with me and waited until I looked at them – and then they glowered at me. And drove on. Whoever this was REALLY wanted me to know how unhappy they were with me because they stopped to make sure I knew they were mad and they were clearly going to wait until they knew I had seen that they were made at me.

I do understand their frustration. I had made a mistake and inconvenienced them for about 20 seconds. If you add in the time they waited to make sure that I saw that they were angry with me, they were delayed for a total of about 30 seconds.

I am not sure what they hoped to accomplish by waiting to make sure I knew they were mad. I made a mistake and was unable to correct it. I felt bad but, I had no ability to correct the mistake, I had to wait on the cars in front of me to move. I doubt their anger at my mistake is going to impact my future driving. This wasn’t something I did intentionally, it was a mistake.

After I dropped off my son and was driving home I was thinking, it would have been nice if they had been compassionate with me instead of angry. After all, it was a mistake. It’s not like I woke up today and thought, I’m going to inconvenience someone on the road and delay them for 20 seconds just to piss them off. I made a mistake, and realistically – it cost them 20 seconds. Why get so mad about a mistake? Why not just – fix the mistake or work around it.

They had several options. They could see the problem and know I had no ability to maneuver or move. They could see that and respond with patience. Or, they could have gone around sooner as there was no one in the other lane. They stayed, honked and got angry because they wanted me - out of their way and for whatever reason, weren’t willing to consider their other options.

The next time you find yourself getting upset or frustrated that someone else is inconveniencing you, step back and reframe what you think is happening. The person most likely didn’t do whatever it is on purpose. Maybe they made an honest mistake or are having other problems. Instead of focusing on how you want them to fix the problem, perhaps consider how you can fix the problem you are now in. Can you work around them? Maybe help them? I don’t know, but what I do know is that having compassion for the people around you – who will make mistakes – feels better than being in a perpetual state of anger and indignation.

I really do think the world would be a better place if we just had more compassion for one another instead of feeling entitled all the time. So please – practice compassion

FYI - I first published this at LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/have-compassion-jennifer-hancock/ 

Applied Humanism - in Business

What's Humanistic about Humanistic Management? Clause Dierksmeier has an excellent article in the Humanistic Management Journal that I think is worth reading. It's a LONG article, but worth the time and effort to read.

It is wonky - but the final section is about practical application for this philosophy with the emphasis on understanding the role ethics plays in how business decisions are made.

Here is a link: http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s41463-016-0002-6 

Even if you aren't interesting in business, economics impacts you. The philosophies and ideas of economists impact our politics. Understanding what underlies those philosophies - in many cases - different opinions about what freedom means - will help you make sense of the arguments being made in the political sphere and that are driving business decisions.

This article is fascinating because, while it is rather wonky, the discussion about the difference between quantitative freedom and qualitative freedom is fascinating and underpins debates between libertarian, liberal and conservative politics. This article really does a good job of breaking down these arguments to their core basis and clarifies what is being debated and why.

From a Humanist perspective I found the section on using the unconditional dignity of humans as the foundation upon which the philosophy is built - to be spot on. Clause covers the history of the concept of human dignity. Humanists, of course, based on the concept of human dignity on autonomy of freedom. And again, the discussion of this is fascinating.

In the section on deep ecology - he coins a term I now love. One of the complaints about Humanism has always been that it seems anthropocentric. While any Humanist will tell you isn't true, it is something we have to repeatedly explain. Clause makes the case that Humanism is anthroporelational not anthropocentric and I really like that concept.

Finally, he addresses the globalist nature of the humanist project, discussing research on the global nature of ethics and talking about the benefits of cosmopolitanism.

This is a seriously meaty essay and well worth reading.

Enjoy.

Ethical Frameworks

In order to be ethical you need to behave ethically. To behave ethically, you have to know what the ethical thing to do is and that requires you to be able to make ethical decisions.

Ethical frameworks provide support and guidance for ethical decision making by enabling the important aspects of the situation to be highlighted and evaluated. If you don’t have an ethical framework, making ethical decisions is nearly impossible. You might behave ethically, but it would be accidental.

Ethics is about what is good and what is bad. It involved making a choice. This is good, that is bad. To be able to make those judgements requires you to have values. Helping people is good, hurting people is bad is an example of a compassion based value.

One of the most famous ethical frameworks is the Bible’s 10 Commandments. Thou Shalt Not Kill, covet, commit adultery, lie, or steal. You should honor your parents and take days off now and again.  Yes, that’s only 7. The other three aren’t really about ethics.

So let’s say we all agree on these 7.  Where things get tricky is when they are in conflict with one another.  Is it ok to lie to prevent a murder?  Only if you value not killing more than you value not lying.

The ranking or prioritizing of your values is what transforms a set of ethical values into an ethical framework.  The more you think about what it is you value the more you are able to prioritize your values ahead of time so that when you are called upon to make an ethical decision, your ethical framework will help you find clarity.

Ethical decision making is rarely about whether something is good or bad. It’s the ability to decide between the greater of two goods or the lesser of two evils.

To learn more about ethical frameworks  - consider taking Living Made Simpler – my 6 hour online course on applied Humanism