House Hunters International, the Rule of Threes and Reality Based Problem Solving.

I have a guilty pleasure. I really like watching people move to foreign countries and figure out where to live. My husband and I have started watching House Hunters International. It dawned on me one of the reasons I like the show is because of how they utilize the rule of threes to help the participants choose where to live.

I have been editing a new book for a publisher on applied humanism for business management. We don't have a release date yet (Feb 2019) - but feel free to look it up as it should be available later in the year. 

Anyway - one of the sections has to do with reality based decision making and critical thinking. And in that section I discuss using the rule of threes to help both expand your thinking and simplify your thinking simultaneously.  I have been using this technique for decades and yes, that does age me.

My point is that if I have a difficult decision to make - I list at least 3 requirements of a good solution, and I consider at least 3 options to find a solution that will meet my criteria.

I find this helps me simplify my thinking quite a bit and yields good results.  I can also use this to engage in brain storming, but that is outside the scope of this post and if you want to learn more - then check out my course, book and dvd - Reality Based Decision Making for Effective Strategy Development - and yes - I do do group training on this topic. https://humanistlearning.com/video-reality-based-decision-making-for-effective-strategy-development/

In House Hunters International - they use the rule of threes, exactly as I do. And the participants are almost always super happy with the results, or at least they say they are.  So how does this work?

We have 2 people looking for housing in some city somewhere in the world. They meet with a realtor and list 3 things they really want in a property. This could be a yard, or a view or a washer and dryer or a specific location close to city center and of course price. Whatever the criteria is - there is at least 3 criteria against which they are going to judge their housing options.

They then view 3 different properties. Some of these properties meet more of the criteria than others do. Some might have a yard but be farther away from their ideal location. Some might be in the ideal location, but more expensive than they want.

The participants then have to weigh the three different properties against their three stated criteria and pick the property that they feel will best meet their needs based on their criteria.  Once a decision is made- we get a 3 months later update on how they are adjusting to their new home. 

I realized that the reason this appeals to me is not only that it allows me to live vicariously through other people  But I also like it because it's such a logical way to go about making what is really a life altering decision.   And I get to think along and consider what decision I would make given the criteria the people set for themselves.  I have learned that I am willing to let go of some of my like to have - to stay within budget. That is super important to me.

Which brings me to another thing I like about the show - participants have to weigh the things they value - against each other. And this is a lot like ethics. We have things we value. When we can't get an ideal solution which of those values is paramount?  I LOVE thinking about what I think is most important in any given situation and I think practicing making decisions - is a good thing to practice because the more you practice the better you get. 

If you are interesting in learning more about how I use the rule of threes - check out the course/book etc - https://humanistlearning.com/video-reality-based-decision-making-for-effective-strategy-development/ 

And just so you know - I would love to live in Valencia Spain or Kobe Japan so if anyone has work for me in either location - let me know. 

Self Discipline is the art of decision making

Self-discipline is being able to make good decisions for oneself.  It is a form of responsible autonomy. You don’t just follow directions, you do what is right because – you yourself decided what is right.

All our actions have consequences. Most of the time we can chose our actions so that we are a benefit to ourselves and to others.  If we don’t take the time to think through our actions, we can hurt ourselves and others. To be self-disciplined is to be morally responsible for your actions and the consequences you have on others.

Eleanor Roosevelt in her book You Learn by Living, wrote, “When you come to understand self-discipline you begin to understand the limits of freedom. You grasp the fact that freedom is never absolute, that it must always be contained within the framework of other people’s freedom.”

I am a Humanist, which means I have accepted that it is my responsibility to balance my need for autonomy and my social obligations in a way that benefits not just me, but the society in which I live.  My autonomy is a socially embedded form of autonomy. This isn’t easy to do and I don’t always get the balance right, but I would suggest that actively being conscious of the need to do this yields better results than just winging it does.  The added bonus is that making an effort to ensure that your actions help others and yourself feels really good.  As Eleanor Roosevelt says (paraphrased) ,  it is a sign of emotional maturity to approach life in such a balanced and responsible fashion.  In fact, it’s the definition of being responsible.

Self Discipline is accepting the responsibility of choosing your actions wisely. 

I teach online courses in personal and professional development from a Humanist perspective.  I also have books and videos available on these topics and more.

https://humanistlearning.com/jennifer-hancock/

What does it mean to be practical

To me being practical means being reality based. I might be shooting for the sky – but my strategy to get there – is grounded in reality.

It does not mean to limit myself. It is just a reminder that if I want to achieve my goals – I need to take practical reality-based steps to make it a reality.

Being practical means understanding that my ultimate objective is more important than the steps I take to get there – so I can innovate and be flexible in my plans. 

Being practical means – not getting side tracked on fun things that don’t get me to my ultimate objective.

Of course, to be practical – means really understanding what my ultimate objective really is.

I offer online personal and professional development programs on humanist life skills. Just published my course – Planning for Personal Success ( https://humanistlearning.com/planforpersonalsuccess/) as an ebook, a paperback and as an audio book. https://amzn.to/2VSFbsu

Problem Solving 101

There’s a system for proper problem solving. Want to know what it is?

According to the University of Pittsburgh, who has since taken down their link, a group had posted a list of seven steps on how to properly solve a problem. These steps are as follows:

1.    Define and Identify the Problem
2.    Analyze the Problem
3.    Identifying Possible Solutions
4.    Selecting the Best Solutions
5.    Evaluating Solutions
6.    Develop an Action Plan
7.    Implement the Solution

Or in laymens terms.

1. Figure out what your real problem is so you don’t waste your time on proxy problems
2. Figure out what is really causing your problem.
3. Figure out what might work to fix the problem.
4. Select your top 3 potential solutions for further research
5. Figure out which of your potential solutions will actually work the best given science and reality and stuff like that. 
6. Create a strategy to implement your best possible solution, taking into account potential problems you may have in implementing it – in case, it turns out that you messed up the previous steps and your solution doesn't actually work.
7. And finally, fix the problem. 

You will notice that this process requires A LOT OF THINKING!  In fact, 6 of the 7 steps are thinking steps. Is all that thinking worth it? YES!  Why? Because all that thinking usually results in the problem actually being solved.

Compare this with how most people problem solve. They guess about what is causing their problem, and then try to fix it by trial and error and fail and then blame others for their problems or conclude the problem is unsolvable and they carry on living with the problem, never considering that their deficient problem solving process might have been holding them back.

Want to know why Humanists spend so much time on learning critical thinking skills?  Read the above. You can’t solve problems well, unless you know how to think critically.

The Power of Critical Thinking

How asking yourself 6 questions can drastically improve for problem solving.

I’m sure you remember the 6  question words in English.  Who, When, Where What, Why and How.  Asking yourself these questions when you are problem solving will improve your problem solving abilities and yield better solutions because if you practice this, you are essentially practicing critical thinking.

When I have a problem to solve, the first question I ask myself is why.  Why do I want to solve this problem? I keep asking this question until I get to the root of my problem. I do this because I want to make absolutely sure I am focused on my real problem and not some related but non-essential problem.  For instance, if I want to try to make it rain, I would ask myself why. Because I want water on my field. Why? Because if the field doesn’t get water, my crops will die and I will die of starvation. Great – now I know my real problem is that I need to get water on my field. Making it rain is a possible solution, but not the only one.  This also helps me be properly motivated to solve my problem, because, I now know why it matters that I solve it.

The next questions are What.   What causes my problem? What might work to solve my problem? These are brain storming questions, but also skeptical questions. I want to make sure my problem solving is based in reality as that will give me the greatest opportunity for success.  By figuring out what might be causing my problem, I can also figure out what might work to solve it.

Now I need to ask myself How. How do I know that. This is a skeptical question to make sure I double check whether what I think I know about what is causing my problem and what might solve it is even true.   I can also ask How, to think about problems with implementing any potential solution.

The When and Where questions are very useful. Sometimes the solution to my problem is to wait. Not now, but then. Where is also useful because what I might want to do can’t be done where I am, but if I move? Maybe.  These are critical questions to developing a winning strategy.

Finally, the question of Who.  Who is going to implement my solution?  If it isn’t me, I am relying on someone else. That can often work and it is always very helpful. But ultimately, you need to be responsible for solving your own problems.