Feeling Overwhelmed?

Learning how to take 1 thing at a time is a critical skill for leaders.

My dad died a couple of months ago. I bring this up not for sympathy but because it left me feeling overwhelmed. I simply didn’t have the brain power to do much of anything besides grieve. And that’s ok. It’s kind of expected with grief.

The problem is that the world doesn’t stop when I feel overwhelmed. I still had things to do, a family to care for, work related tasks and publication deadlines to make. As much as I might want to scream – stop the world I want to get off – it’s not going to happen.

One thing at a time

I find that when I am overwhelmed, I need to not look at the enormity of the task or tasks in front of me, but just focus on 1 thing at a time and get that 1 thing done.  Once it is done, I can do the next thing.

The hard part in doing one thing at a time is not worrying about the other things that also need to get done. To help me with this – I write out a timeline – what all needs to get done. Knowing that I am not going to miss something helps me focus in the present on the 1 thing I need to do. When I am done, I look at the list for the next thing.

And when other things come up that I need to deal with – I look at my list. It’s either time for me to work on that other thing or it’s not. My to do list helps me to reject intrusions that I can’t handle at the moment. I might add them to a to do later list, but I’m not taking them on right at this minute.

What I find when I do this is that by allowing myself to be overwhelmed and allowing myself to restrict my activities to just those things that I really have to do and by doing them 1 thing at a time, I fairly quickly stop feeling so overwhelmed and am able to return to normal activity levels sooner rather than later.

Be Realistic

At this stage in my life I have no illusions about what I can handle and what I can’t. And I know that I don’t do anyone any favors by pretending I’m ok when I’m really not.

We all get overwhelmed. That’s ok. Not taking care of yourself just makes things worse. Trying to soldier on through and get things done when you aren’t capable of it only means that the things you do get done don’t get done well and you will continue to feel stressed out and overwhelmed and you will not be performing at the level you should be.

The most effective way to get back to a high level of performance is to take a break and to focus on 1 thing at a time and do it well so that your brain can relax. If your brain is so stressed it can’t think well, give it a break. The sooner you acknowledge your frail humanity, the sooner you can do what you need to do to take care of yourself and get better.

If you are feeling overwhelmed, take it 1 day at a time and 1 task at a time. You have my permission.  These are boundaries you need to set for yourself so that you can take care of others. Good luck.

Feeling Overwhelmed?

If you are doing too much, goal setting can help you prioritize.

If you are competent, you are busy. Sometimes too busy. People are always asking you to help out and take on a bit more work. So in addition to your work, your family and the upkeep of the house, you also have volunteering and hobbies and well, life.

I am also an entrepreneur. There are all sorts of things I could and should be doing to support my business, but the reality is, I have time constraints. I can’t do everything.

Yet, I don’t feel overwhelmed. My secret? I understand my goals so that I can prioritize.

Knowing what you want to accomplish, and more importantly why you want to accomplish helps you sort through the day to day demands and prioritize those that are critical, that that need to be done and those that would be nice to do.

Lots of people have a to do list. What they have trouble with is deciding which stuff can wait. In order to prioritize your to-do list, you have to know why those items are on your list in the first place.

We have primary goals and secondary goals and then intermediary goals that help us achieve our secondary and primary goals.  My primary goal is to live life fully and to leave the world a better place.  All my secondary goals, like create a business to help people learn how to stop bullies are in support of my primary goal.  My intermediate goals, like call on companies to talk to them about buying my sexual harassment trainings, are intermediate goals, designed to help me achieve my secondary goal which will help me achieve my primary goal of making the world a better place.

The reason it’s important to have a goal hierarchy is because you can’t prioritize your to-do list if your goals your to-do list are in support of aren’t prioritized! When I am in a time crunch, I look at my to do list and it’s very easy to sort into must do and can wait. Why? Because I have my priorities straight.

To learn more how to do this – take my ecourse: Planning for Personal Success at:  https://humanistlearning.com/planforpersonalsuccess/