Ever wonder why people can become so obsessed with cats? The answer lies in a psychological concept called variable reinforcement. This happens when sometimes we get what we want—like a cat’s affection—and sometimes we don’t.
Cats are perfect at this because, let’s face it, they have their own agenda. Sometimes they give us attention, and sometimes they completely ignore us. This unpredictability makes us crave their affection even more.
The key is that variable reinforcement strengthens behaviors and attachments. It’s the same mechanism behind a lot of other behaviors, from gambling addictions to attachment in abusive relationships. In fact, variable reinforcement is one of the reasons people stay in toxic situations—they’re constantly chasing the next positive moment, no matter how rare it is.
If you want to understand more about how this works and how it can affect relationships, check out my website bullyvaccineproject.com. It’s free and includes helpful primers on variable reinforcement and how to break the cycle if you find yourself in an unhealthy relationship dynamic.
As for cats, they’re not being manipulative—they just have cat thoughts and don’t think like humans. But their behavior can teach us a lot about why we attach to unpredictable sources of affection.
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