Mending a Broken Heart

To a certain extent – broken hearts just take time to mend.  However, there are things to do to make sure you don’t do something stupid while your heart mends.

Part of what is happening is that you are in the habit of being with and around your ex.  You have to break that habit and that’s a lot like going cold turkey off a drug. Your body and your brain is going to fight you. Being aware that that is what is going on puts you in a position to be proactive about how you respond.

For instance, knowing that your body is going to be craving physical touch to get the oxytocin that we get from hugs and physical contact means, you can seek out friends who will give you hugs and help you through the worst of the withdrawals without you doing something stupid to get your oxytocin fix. In other words, don’t be afraid to ask your friends for hugs.

Knowing that you are going to have to break the habit of having someone to talk to regularly means you can be proactive and seek out other outlets to get that intellectual connection. Perhaps join a club, or go to a lecture.

There are a myriad of habits that get broken when we break up – which is why it’s so painful. But as you find yourself craving something, remind yourself, this is part of the withdrawal process and find another outlet for that craving. Eventually, you won’t crave your ex anymore and you will feel much better.
Just give it the time it needs and don’t be afraid of your emotions.

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