Compassion for others lead to compassion for self

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When dealing with difficult people it is really easy to feel sorry for yourself and wallow.  Wallowing is sometimes a necessary self-indulgence and something that we all need to do at some point.  The problem is that self-indulgent wallowing isn’t going to help you solve your problem

The common advice given to keep you from needing to wallow in the first place is to feel good about yourself so that the negativity other people direct at you doesn’t affect you. This is obviously very hard to do.  Most people would rather feel sorry for themselves.

I take a different approach. Rather than trying to make yourself feel better, I encourage people to feel sorry for the person who is being mean to them. The reason is because the more compassion you can muster up for others, the more compassion you can muster up for yourself.

So, the next time you find yourself confronted by someone who is trying to demean you, try feeling sorry for them. When you forgive people for not being perfectly wonderful, you will find that you can forgive yourself for not being perfect all the time either.

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