How to hit on the ladies – like a Humanist

Don’t. Humanists don’t hit on ladies. They talk to them as the very real humans they are. 

This may come as a shocker to those of you aren’t familiar with the going’s on within the atheist community, but we seem to have a lot of guys who have no idea how to hit on ladies without being creepy.

I’m not sure this is a problem specific to atheist groups. I actually think this is more of a generic human problem. Anyway – to help my romance challenged fan boys out – let me give you some advice on how to not be a creep when hitting on a lady.  Don’t hit on her at all. By definition, if you are hitting on her, you are being creepy.

Chuck Wendig has an excellent article about this here:  If this is something you struggle with this – read the entire thing. You will be a better person for it.

To sum up his advice up for those of you who are too lazy to click through the link – here it is:
“Hitting on them” is a thing you do when you see them as a target, a victim, a receptacle for your pleasure. It’s dismissive and unpleasant and often embarrassing for all parties.  
It’s also aggressive which is why it’s inherently creepy.

The solution to the problem of needing to connect to someone to hopefully form a romantic or even just purely sexual bond is to talk to them; as a human and to respect them as the independent autonomous thinking beings that they actually are.

This talk to them as human approach works precisely because, as Chuck points out, they aren’t a receptacle for your plug, they are a human.

Treat women as fully human and you will get a lot farther with them than if you don’t. You will also attract a higher quality of woman. That’s how a Humanist hits on a lady.

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